Lavarion has been suffering for some time from a number of issues that I need not detail here. Suffice it to say that he has been gradually withdrawing from the outside world, and today it was made clear that I wouldn't be seeing him for an indeterminate amount of time. I do not know if this is on the scale of weeks, or eternity.
My father died when I was 18. I don't know how long Lavarion will last, but I do not at all expect him to see old age. For the purposes of my own experience, he might be gone already. I'm running out of family.
Between that and a decrease in the local furry population, Kardokis and I are now almost completely alone out here, and I am starting to feel it. I suppose that is the risk of entering a situation that provides only exactly what one needs, with no extra buffer.
I find myself questioning if this is the right place for us after all, though any other options present significant disadvantages of their own. Combined with a few other recent events, I feel a bit as though the world is closing in on me.